performative instalation

I’ll join with black despair against my soul, / And to myself become an enemy”

When I arrived at Schloss Solitude I was told that one of the fellows, Assaf Allasaf is the best ping-pong player. Although I’m a good player who could defeat everyone else at Solitude, everytime I played against Assaf I lost because I always bore in mind that I cannot be number one, not only in sport but in any other discipline or situation. He might have been the best player, but the fierce fights are lead against myself. And I don’t want to follow Kafka’s advice anymore: In the fight between you and the world, back the world.